Sunday, February 25, 2007

Magic Moments

When you are ready, Magic happens.

Unexpectedly, today was magical. Not only like every Sunday tends to be, with the Sunday morning conversation with Pawan, and the lazy lie in, but in bigger, more fantistical way.
Chamki and i had a sudden adventure- complete with memorabilia and photographs.
Then, my super-smart, super-funny, super-hero bloger friend decided to take me out for coffee and we had the fun-n-est time. Surprises after surprises occassionally interspersed with reality checks (in the form of "madam, this is India") and runs up slopes, races to beer shops (which, btw, never had beer- only noodle bar did) , bad jokes, and lots of discoveries.
To you, who made this so fun,
Thank you. :)

Friday, February 23, 2007

21 Things I Want in a Lover

Do you derive joy when someone else succeeds?
Do you not play dirty when engaged in competition?
Do you have a big intellectual capacity but know
That it alone does not equate wisdom?
Do you see everything as an illusion?
But enjoy it even though you are not of it?
Are you both masculine and feminine?politically aware?
And don't believe in capital punishment?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer

Do you derive joy from diving in and seeing that
Loving someone can actually feel like freedom?
are you funny?
la self-deprecating? like adventure?
and have many formed opinions?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer
I figure I can describe it since I have a choice
in the matter
These are 21 things I choose to choose in a lover

I'm in no hurry I could wait forever
I'm in no rush cuz I like being solo
There are no worries and certainly no pressure
in the meantime
I'll live like there's no tomorrow

Are you uninhibited in bed? more than three times
a week?
Up for being experimental? are you athletic?
Are you thriving in a job that helps your brother?
are you not addicted?

...curious and communicative...

Alanis Morissette

musings with lyrics...

if we chose our lovers from a checklist, this would be mine.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Good Morning Monday!

A glorious monday morning
does anyone ever say that!?

became with a quiet wake up.
and lots of fresh air
in a long walk around bandra
with a coffee and sketch stopover
crepe station.

came back to SARK's newsletter for February:

" Our heads are round to allow our thoughts to change direction. "
Francis Picabia

Sunday, February 11, 2007

something stupid


Days like this, i just feel stupid. stupid for loving. for loving like this. for believing too much. for lighting a candle in prayer for a lover who's leaving for holiday with another lover. for violating my own principles. for hating and not blaming and still answering calls. for agreeing to be the other, then the one, then the other for almost half a year... but love has its lessons and my current mindscape would have me believe that this has a purpose and however painful, loving relationships are worth sustaining. is there never an answer? does love always have to be discovered and understood alone?

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Soul Card writings- A Series

These are a series of cards I drew during a conversation, on a particular issue... a long, convoluted issue with no end or solution in sight. This card came so often- all the time, every pick it was either that card or the base. I see a relevance, a connection. But not entirely. if you see one, if something immediately strikes you about the image, tell me. Maybe it'll help.
To see the card that corresponds to each of these pieces, click on the date.
it may bleed
don't be afraid to get dirty
it may hurt
but it's surface
-the wound.
don't be afraid
just breathe
i know you are blameless.
are you still hiding something?
show me.
you are already forgiven.
am i?
blood. bleed. bloody.
cut. sever. abort.
do you know the truth?
there will be calm.
pray for clarity.
even your clarity
move into the sun.
or else
distress is an experience
at once
and catalytic.
change is on the way.
a rupture
then blood
clean hands
are not enough to prove innocence.
i am stained
never again
that freshness
of face and soul
but not unfeeling.
look at me
dark brown
like chocolate
or dried blood
on my face
my hands
my memory.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

To Abhishek

i pray for you
my heart
a stable core
amidst all the turbulence
of anger.rain.heartbreak.
pray for you
as you have given me
a wild but unwavering
accept my gratitude.

Anda Pau

Dummy, you can see your soul card here

To Chamki

wipe the surface
just beneath it
is clarity.

the friction
or the daily grind.
just wipe the surface
and beneath it

you can see this card here
burst open like
flaming stars like
a million eyes
open and alive like
red like
an unexpected kiss
like a flower blooming out of time like
a simultaneous climax like
emotional outburst like

2nd February, 2007

in response to this soul card

Thursday, February 01, 2007

an exercise in recollection

come with me while
i run
chase after me and
when i'm lost
just look for a shadow peeking
just behind you
follow it
i will run
run till we reach
a place of

It's the edge of the cliff
one foot suspended
open abyss below
hold my hand
let's leap
we'll scream "free falling"
all the way down

note: this was written in response to a soul card. see the card here